AuToMaTiC eMaiL RePLy MeSsaGeS

On this bluey blacky Monday..
This is what I would like to create in order to avoid replying mails
:P *bleh*

AuToMaTiC eMaiL RePLy MeSsaGeS>>>

1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get theposition. Be prepared for my mood.

2. I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you.

3. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office.If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.

4. Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management.

5. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until Ireturn from vacation on 4/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in theorder it was received.